Perpetual TFLN

[petulantpoet]

You know the drill; pick some texts (or write your own) and post them for people to reply to! But it’s permanent and not just for Fridays!
the actual website | web archive lol

Comments

[magichorrorvision]

Linking this for posterity.

To: Gerard Keay (Goth)

[magichorrorvision]

I've gone down to the Library three times this week and each time Martin Blackwood was not available for my apology. She doesn't honestly expect me to waste time hunting him down every day, does she?

[burntbooks]

Jesus who’d have thought a man so big could make himself vanish so effectively. Props to his avoiding you skills. If that’s what he’s doing (it’s what I’d be doing if only to waste your time on purpose, then again he’s nice and I’m not.)
Have you been going on company time or on lunch? Maybe you just take the same lunch? If I see him I can let him know you’ve been looking and you’re not looking to pick another fight.

[magichorrorvision]

I'm certain that's what he's doing. I specifically stopped by on my smoke break Monday afternoon and this morning and the woman at the front desk rudely refused to tell me where he was when I asked.

I just want to get this over with and move on with my career. I feel as if I've been humiliated enough over an archaic policy. I know Gertrude thinks that I was unprofessional, but I'm not the one who escalated things to Department Heads and the Director. If anything, I feel like his evasion proves that he knows he went too far. He's probably too embarrassed to face me. Rightly so.

[burntbooks]

Look I’m going to be honest with you because I feel like you’re not understanding some stuff and it’s going to make your life actively harder.

I don’t think you understand the spirit and purpose of a library, it’s a community resource, even in an academic institution. You aren’t the most important person in the community and acting like you think you are will hold you back.

Next time you’re told something is policy and the person you’re complaining to can’t change it; drop it or follow the procedure for change. There is no third option. Deal with it.

And maybe don’t include that in your apology unless you want to be dragged into another meeting.

[magichorrorvision]

I apologize. And here, I thought our primary function here at the Institute, let alone in The Archives, was to archive the public's legitimate encounters with the supernatural.

Don't tell me that if you needed to validate some information in order to counter a Leitner or locate one that you wouldn't have an issue with the policy. No, it's fine! Books are out murdering people. God forbid someone take an additional communal resource. I'm sure that the wealthy patrons who have access to our library desperately need an almanac from 1921.

I realize that in this case, my statement is woefully outdated, but that is my point! The Archives are a disgrace. You have to know that. Why aren't we digitized so that multiple people can access the same resources at the same time? Why am I even wasting my time on a statement from 1921, where the statement givers are long dead? I should be working on current statements. There is no absolutely no reason that we should be years behind, let alone decades.

To: Gerard Keay

[thecomingend]

Just checking in to make sure you haven't been the victim of any curses lately. It's a new service we're providing for our loyal customers.

Re: To: Gerard Keay

[burntbooks]

Unless there’s a 72 hour migraine curse I think I’m curse free!

[thecomingend]

Technically not a curse, but definitely not a blessing.
We have a wide variety of feverfew, ginger and turmeric we can deliver to your door.

[burntbooks]

At this point anything that might stop water tasting weird and my eye twitching is worth a shot.
Didn’t realise you offered a delivery service.

[thecomingend]

It's new. Still in the testing phase. Can I get you anything else?

It’s the night after Halloween and I couldn’t resist | OPEN

[burntbooks]

1. I’m sorry I called you a pussy for going home at 4am, that’s actually very late and you were being perfectly reasonable.

2. Left at 6am when the bar closed and got breakfast still in our Halloween costumes. It was great at the time but I feel like I’m dying now.

3. May have woken up at 1pm, fully dressed, on the couch, with my vampire teeth and a hashbrown in my coat pocket.

[nosyrosie]

I knew you stole my hash brown, Mr “Rosie I respect you far too much to steal a hash brown when you’re this drunk!”

[burntbooks]

It was funny at the time. Also I traded it, there should be a skull shaped shot glass in your handbag that I stole from the bar.

[nosyrosie]

That explains the reason my keys were so sticky when I got them out when I got home.

[burntbooks]

Hey it’s a very cool shot glass!
Also please don’t tell Gertrude about any of my behaviour for at least the 48 hours it’s going to take to cure my hangover.

[pawnish]

[ have a voice memo. Why? Because, Gerry. Because. ]

Gerry, Gerry, Gerry, Gerry. And this is why if we don’t want to feel like shit we take a shot of water per shot, mate.

I believe someone called me gramps when I told you chickens that last night.

[burntbooks]

[ Thank god for voice notes so he doesn’t have to even attempt to spell. Even if he sounds like shit from all the smoking and loud singing along to 80s and 90s alternative music. ]

I don’t think water would have saved me from nine tequilas. Nine.
How bad is my Snapchat story? I haven’t had the guts to check it.

[pawnish]

See if you drank nine shots of water, you’d still feel better. You seriously need to trust your elders, young padawan.

Blimey who Snapchats on a pub night? You children know nothing about not leaving evidence.

1

[magichorrorvision]

4 am is a perfectly reasonable hour for someone not at uni to go home.

Also, it was hard to take it to heart when you were hissing it between ill fitting vampire teeth, so you're forgiven.

[burntbooks]

Yeah, well. You were right, you did miss breakfast, but you probably got considerably more sleep.

Heh. “Puthy” probably didn’t hit too hard. You got home safe though, thanks for remembering to text that you had. Further apologies for replying with a kissy face emoji, I was very, very drunk.

[magichorrorvision]

Not sure I could tolerate breakfast. I won't make the mistake of trying to keep up with you again.

I did. Martin walked me to my station and reminded me to text you when I got home. And I suppose I won't have to get HR involved this time, but if it happens again, a report will have to be filed.

3

[thecomingend]

Sounds like it was a fun night. At least you had the foresight to get breakfast or at least a victim with foresight.

Sorry I didn't make it.

[burntbooks]

Four of us made it until the bar closed at 6am and went to the cafe on the corner so I had a full breakfast and everything.

No worries though, it was all people from my job and Janes party looked like fun from the snaps she was sending me, sorry I couldn’t come to that, everyone had already got tickets to the thing I talked them in to, it would have been a real dick move to pull out even if I did want to see you.

[thecomingend]

Excellent. Very responsible of you.

[ Oh...well, that's nice.]It was fun for a bit, but then I ran into my ex and the night went downhill rather quickly. Be grateful you were spared my spiraling and revisiting my idea of becoming a modern day hermit.